Tuesday, 18 February 2014

What Kind of Love - Childish Gambino





What kind of love just stays the same?
What kind of love don't die alone?
What kind of love would take this long?
What kind of love don't make you whole?

Meet me at the studio, I just wanna play you something
Meet me at the studio, I just wanna tell you something

'Cause you said it's not my heart
Even though we're far apart
Can't remember how to solve the lies

You like to call me koala
I'll be your Simba, you're Nala
Wherever you go I'll follow
The lies

Drove for hours just to see your face
Sorry

Drove for hours just to see your face
We should've talked if just to clear the space
But now we stare at each other, bury whatever feeling that was

He text to keep your heart d-stacks, keep your heart
These girls are smart d-stacks, these girls are smart
Don't know

Why get a dog? It's just gonna die
Everything you love is just going to leave you one day
And that's just real shit, he can still spit but what's the point?
I said a lot of stupid stuff, I think that I was growing up

What kind of love don't hurt so bad?
What kind of love don't feel this way?
What kind of love would make me fall?

Little lies, little lies, little lies
Little lies, little lies, little lies

Sunday, 8 December 2013

a series of fragmentary thoughts [2]



This is what distance (confusion mostly) looks like in times new roman

I wrote this close to the end. I didn’t even bother editing or finishing it because I was no longer in the same place that I was when I began to write it. I think I may have even written this while drunk, I don’t know. I just needed to post something and this happened to be sitting in the dark corners of my laptop. It is an incomplete post but it makes some kind of sense... hopefully. A lame piece but a piece nonetheless.

He is infinite and perfect, a mouthful of holy prayers written in the name of love. Words are never enough when I think of him, the do not begin to describe the glory of his greatness. 

When we are together, they stare (at him mostly) with this longing look in their eyes, like they know the Soul of the World breathes through him. 

He is a full orchestra and I am hypnotized by his devilish symphony. 

He is the moon and I am the midnight tide, brought to shore by his promise to return.

I am envious of the freedom that the wind has, she can dance around his heavenly body and sweep through his desert whilst I am here wondering if he’s wondering about me.

Anahata is sitting with her back towards us, tallying how many times I have drowned in his skin, I think she has lost count

I’ve loved to the point of confusion, never thinking in full, just fragmentary.sentences,punctuated.by.the.thought.of.you

a series of fragmentary thoughts [4]



The undisturbed train 

The past is an ugly place to live in but I find the most comfort in it because that is where we are still an is, that is where we still ex(is)t.

This is what being broken looks like

A campfire is more than just a flame and we are more than just two people that love(d). 

Wilhelms scream is echoing somewhere in the void that your absence has created 

I settled then you settled then we settled and I watched us die before we drew our last breath.
The walls are shaking, that may be my fault.

I’m sorry. 

We kept moving. Loving. Talking. Relating. Absorbing. Speaking. Dying. Melting into the silence. 

“I don’t know about my loving anymore, all that I know is that I’m falling”

I fell. And now I’m that awkward tall person, stumbling in the dark, trying to find stability in something that has become a “was”.
This is not supposed to make any kind of sense. This is just me drinking, typing, writing, expressing, purging, bleeding. 

I got drunk today and thought that it would make me forget. All it did was resurrect the memory of the first time we met and I found myself wishing that I had done something else that day. Maybe then our paths would’ve never led us to this forsaken labyrinth. I don’t know. 

I will always remember the first thing you said to me when I made your bed my own.
“well don’t wait up for me”
The hangover wasn’t the worst part of waking up, leaving was.
This is what love sounds like. 

Sounded like.



a series of fragmentary thoughts [3]



Secrets

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror the other day.
My eyes were soft with unfinished weeping,
I felt the urge to sob and sob and sob but I was afraid that my face would start to look like yours.

So I walked instead. 

Your name dirtied the air and I no longer wanted to breathe.
It clung to my skin and followed me everywhere as if it were carried by the wind.
I began to hate it. 

You.


Tuesday, 26 November 2013

sunrise, sunrise, looks like morning in your eyes.





I found these really cool paintings on tumblr (tumblr has now become my best friend). I just wish I knew who they were by because I would really like to see more of their work (I'm doing this thing where I follow up on the people that I reblog). 

So anyway, I like these.

a series of fragmentary thoughts [1]



I became a shadow overnight. 


Eternity is the great seducer of men

and I somehow managed to get myself furiously drunk on the idea that forever actually exists.  


I became a shadow overnight


A figment contorted by the image of love dancing with the wind. Snatching riddles from the mouths of angels and begging the sun to shine a little longer as if all prayers are answered from heaven. 


You were happy

and I was happy

and We were happy, a strange pair with wandering limbs and eager hands. 


The gods laughed when we told them we found riches in each other’s beds, at how we followed the path mapped by the scratch marks etched on the softness of your back and at how we fucked until we were sick of the smell of skin on skin. 


I buried the sound of their laughter in the folds of my sheets and hoped for everything, instead I was suffocated by an air, pregnant with desperation, that insinuated itself in the uncomfortable silence birthed by your fading confidence in our union. 


And then it rained, 


a torrential downpour that drowned us in its merciless waves of melancholy. 


And you were happy

And i was happy


You became a shadow overnight. Ghosts emerged at your feet. I smiled and they melted. 


It rained some more. 


And we weren’t happy.


Darkness danced on my tongue and I became hungry for something that had now become intangible. I starved.


We became a shadow overnight.


- siege

Bound 2 Parody

 

and people ask me why I love Seth Rogen and James Franco so much. This video is perfect!